Daphne's Best friend Myra writes their story as a flashback -
A friend like no other
D.& I met at my 22nd birthday party. She disagrees. She says we met in the Language Institute studying Spanish. Since she is better at details than I am, I will not disagree, but I have confidence in my emotional memory, so the meeting for real was on the dance floor in a small apt. in Malaga, Spain. I fancy myself a good, rhythmic dancer (no ballroom steps here), but Daphne did something so different from what I knew. Her almost 6' frame was ponying up in a most unique and memorable way. Was this the English style of dance? I didn't ask, but met her on the dance floor instead, bringing my 60's style learned in black bars to join her English gait. Little did I know that I would forever be counting my birthdays, along with the date of our meeting, in the same breadth, pretty much forever.
At the end of the Language program, everyone else left and Daphne & I remained. We had a lot in common, competing with each other on who could live on less a day. She was matching my $1 a day room with one for 50 cents and eating on less too.
Soon we were hanging out together on a regular basis, becoming fast friends. I was going to a village where I was spending time with a potter and his family and Daphne came with me to visit. We must have done a lot of other things together up until the time she was ready to move on. As I understand now, she had constraints on time and money imposed by her government which I did not. So, she would return to England and I would stay. But, we had a plan: To meet on the post office steps in Seville in April. Before I could leave to meet her, a telegram arrived. Daphne had a loss in her immediate family, followed by an asthma attack. I left Spain soon after and went east to Greece, not expecting to see each other again.
In October 1969, I returned to my parents' home in Yonkers, NY having contracted a serious infection on my leg that left a scar, colorfully referred to as "the rose of Jericho." Not more than a few days later, already at the height of my misery being home, my father answered the phone and I heard him say, "Well, she's right here." Very soon after, we were picking Daphne up at Penn Station in NYC. And as we both looked at each other, then pointed at each other, we burst out laughing. We were clearly no longer on the $1 a day diet in Spain, but instead had turned into two rather hale, hefty and hearty women!
My next memories are spending time together during the summer of 1970 going to every free event there was in NY, and there were many. Pete Seeger figures somewhere in there. Daphne and I have always enjoyed foraging for fun and I think we have done a decent job of it over the years.
There were more travels ahead of us. In the summer of 1971, before I started a new job, Daphne and I took a cross country trip in my VW bug to visit a friend I had traveled with in Yugoslavia. We went as far as New Mexico together and I returned to work in a drug prevention program while Daphne kept on to So. America. I remember complaining to Daphne that I would be working with a very straight looking guy, the same one I ended up marrying , but not before Daphne & I with another friend of mine, Jane, had traveled to Bolivia and Peru. Once again, Daphne kept going and Jane and I returned to NY, where I resumed my work, my relationship and plans for our wedding in the spring. My happy marriage ended tragically when Bob died two years later of leukemia. I don't have much memory of anything for awhile, but, at some point, I started visiting Daphne in her communal living quarters and she would visit me at my house in Yonkers. I was not planning much then in the way of good times, just struggling to stay afloat.
Kids & Grandkids
Bob died in 1976 the same year that a little boy was born who has remained a part of my life. Of course, things are never that simple and little David came along with a challenging father who gave me a merry run for 20 years. Daphne was nice enough to witness the betrothal 10 years into the relationship, bringing her kids with her from where they last were in Botswana. It was probably the first time I had heard about Botswana, but not the last :-)
During the years of difficult men and their progeny, we did everything people did to support families, raise kids, pursue careers, and just survive. We visited each other, sometimes with mates, but often alone. Daphne was without John early on and struggling with asthma and an overwhelming life. I remember finding her in a condition that worried me. But, we kept in touch, brought our kids along with us and managed to continue our friendship. By then, she was living in Vermont and I made sure we visited, first with Artie and the kids, eventually alone, at least once a year.
But, better times were coming. We just didn't know it then. I met a very, very nice man. What better way than to bring him into the fold, welcomed by Daphne, and sleeping together for the first time in the little house in Vermont. ( I hope you're not blushing!)
Did this mean our travels were over? Not quite. Remember Botswana? Well, yes, we took a little trek together through So. Africa & Botswana, revisiting some places where Daphne had been when her brother Hugh lived and worked as an Engineer, living there with Pat, his wife. Hugh was ill at the time of this trip so it was especially meaningful when we met someone quite by chance who had worked with him and told us held Hugh in the highest regard.
Our next rendezvous came after Hugh died and Daphne was spending time in Norfolk with Pat. I popped up for a visit and got a chance to see Daphne's home territory for the first time. I told her that I never believed her stories, so needed to see things for myself. My life changed dramatically after that trip because my daughter, after living 13 years in Vienna, applied for a job in NYC and got it. So, now I am a happy camper with my son and his family, all within shouting distance (I shout loud). And that is the stage we are at now, enjoying our respective children (usually) and grandchildren (always). And, even better, they are forcing Daphne and me to spend more time together in the Brooklyn & NY area. Of course, Daphne made fast friends with Seymour too who provides a B&B for some of her trips to the area. Coincidentally, as I write this, this weekend is one of those times. And Cindy & Monika will be visiting here too!
- MYRA.
A friend like no other
D.& I met at my 22nd birthday party. She disagrees. She says we met in the Language Institute studying Spanish. Since she is better at details than I am, I will not disagree, but I have confidence in my emotional memory, so the meeting for real was on the dance floor in a small apt. in Malaga, Spain. I fancy myself a good, rhythmic dancer (no ballroom steps here), but Daphne did something so different from what I knew. Her almost 6' frame was ponying up in a most unique and memorable way. Was this the English style of dance? I didn't ask, but met her on the dance floor instead, bringing my 60's style learned in black bars to join her English gait. Little did I know that I would forever be counting my birthdays, along with the date of our meeting, in the same breadth, pretty much forever.
At the end of the Language program, everyone else left and Daphne & I remained. We had a lot in common, competing with each other on who could live on less a day. She was matching my $1 a day room with one for 50 cents and eating on less too.
Soon we were hanging out together on a regular basis, becoming fast friends. I was going to a village where I was spending time with a potter and his family and Daphne came with me to visit. We must have done a lot of other things together up until the time she was ready to move on. As I understand now, she had constraints on time and money imposed by her government which I did not. So, she would return to England and I would stay. But, we had a plan: To meet on the post office steps in Seville in April. Before I could leave to meet her, a telegram arrived. Daphne had a loss in her immediate family, followed by an asthma attack. I left Spain soon after and went east to Greece, not expecting to see each other again.
In October 1969, I returned to my parents' home in Yonkers, NY having contracted a serious infection on my leg that left a scar, colorfully referred to as "the rose of Jericho." Not more than a few days later, already at the height of my misery being home, my father answered the phone and I heard him say, "Well, she's right here." Very soon after, we were picking Daphne up at Penn Station in NYC. And as we both looked at each other, then pointed at each other, we burst out laughing. We were clearly no longer on the $1 a day diet in Spain, but instead had turned into two rather hale, hefty and hearty women!
My next memories are spending time together during the summer of 1970 going to every free event there was in NY, and there were many. Pete Seeger figures somewhere in there. Daphne and I have always enjoyed foraging for fun and I think we have done a decent job of it over the years.
There were more travels ahead of us. In the summer of 1971, before I started a new job, Daphne and I took a cross country trip in my VW bug to visit a friend I had traveled with in Yugoslavia. We went as far as New Mexico together and I returned to work in a drug prevention program while Daphne kept on to So. America. I remember complaining to Daphne that I would be working with a very straight looking guy, the same one I ended up marrying , but not before Daphne & I with another friend of mine, Jane, had traveled to Bolivia and Peru. Once again, Daphne kept going and Jane and I returned to NY, where I resumed my work, my relationship and plans for our wedding in the spring. My happy marriage ended tragically when Bob died two years later of leukemia. I don't have much memory of anything for awhile, but, at some point, I started visiting Daphne in her communal living quarters and she would visit me at my house in Yonkers. I was not planning much then in the way of good times, just struggling to stay afloat.
Kids & Grandkids
Bob died in 1976 the same year that a little boy was born who has remained a part of my life. Of course, things are never that simple and little David came along with a challenging father who gave me a merry run for 20 years. Daphne was nice enough to witness the betrothal 10 years into the relationship, bringing her kids with her from where they last were in Botswana. It was probably the first time I had heard about Botswana, but not the last :-)
 |
| Daphne and Myra standing at the back - Daphn'es son's wedding in India |
During the years of difficult men and their progeny, we did everything people did to support families, raise kids, pursue careers, and just survive. We visited each other, sometimes with mates, but often alone. Daphne was without John early on and struggling with asthma and an overwhelming life. I remember finding her in a condition that worried me. But, we kept in touch, brought our kids along with us and managed to continue our friendship. By then, she was living in Vermont and I made sure we visited, first with Artie and the kids, eventually alone, at least once a year.
But, better times were coming. We just didn't know it then. I met a very, very nice man. What better way than to bring him into the fold, welcomed by Daphne, and sleeping together for the first time in the little house in Vermont. ( I hope you're not blushing!)
 |
| Myra and Daphne on Daphne's 70th Birthday |
Our next rendezvous came after Hugh died and Daphne was spending time in Norfolk with Pat. I popped up for a visit and got a chance to see Daphne's home territory for the first time. I told her that I never believed her stories, so needed to see things for myself. My life changed dramatically after that trip because my daughter, after living 13 years in Vienna, applied for a job in NYC and got it. So, now I am a happy camper with my son and his family, all within shouting distance (I shout loud). And that is the stage we are at now, enjoying our respective children (usually) and grandchildren (always). And, even better, they are forcing Daphne and me to spend more time together in the Brooklyn & NY area. Of course, Daphne made fast friends with Seymour too who provides a B&B for some of her trips to the area. Coincidentally, as I write this, this weekend is one of those times. And Cindy & Monika will be visiting here too!
- MYRA.
